One of my favourite songs from the musical ‘Les Miserables’ is titled ‘Master of the House’ which offers an extensive list of how to rip off your paying guests....
Charge 'em for the lice. Extra for the mice
Two percent for looking in the mirror twice
Here a little slice. There a little cut
Three percent for sleeping with the window shut
When it comes to fixing prices
There are a lot of tricks he knows
How it all increases. All those bits and pieces
Jesus! It's amazing how it grows!
I am ashamed to say that, when it comes to fixing prices, a few of the Eastbourne hotels have managed to perfect the art of extracting additional money from their guests using a variety of ploys. For your information, I am happy to offer a few of the most common money generating schemes as follows:
Room only rate
I appreciate that some guests might not want breakfast but the tendency to offer room only rates is often a ploy to get you to fork out outrageous amounts of money for poor quality breakfasts. We include a full English breakfast as part of the advertised rate and do not believe that breakfast should be offered at an additional cost.
Early booking in
I find it hard to believe that some hotels expect you to pay extra money for the opportunity of getting into you room before 2.00pm....what justification can they offer for such practice. If you tell us that you are arriving early then we will always try to accommodate your wishes – and at no extra charge.
Late booking out
Our guests appreciate that rooms need to be serviced before the next occupants arrive but charging you extra to stay beyond 10.00am is a bit steep. If you want to leave late and we can accomodate that within the housekeepers hours then we will do so – and at no extra charge to you.
A recent traveller review for a local hotel thought that the £2 cost for a parking permit was rather reasonable...there are other reports of guests being charged up to £5. These permits cost hoteliers £0.50 to purchase and our philosophy is to give all of our guests complementary parking permits for the duration of their stay.
Some hotels like to charge you extra for those little extras ....such as soap and shampoo. We don’t expect our guests to provide these essentials and we certainly don’t intend to fill our foyer with machines that dispense such items. We are happy to provide soap, shampoo, toilet paper etc, .... to our guest with our compliments.
You can see the sea from all of our front rooms if you lean out of the window as far as possible and look to your right. Of course we don’t charge extra for our ‘sea view’ and certainly do not extort additional money from our guests on arrival. The price we agree is the price you pay...and that includes taxes!
Please let me know of any other money spinners which you find out about and I will be happy to include them on my list.
PS The musical piece titled ‘Master of the House’ can be at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SFPsEwV38Q0